fbpx
  • Hi Pat

    Thank you so much for your comment and good advise truly appreciated and glad you like the story line.
    Would it be cheeky to ask if you would comment on my misunderstood submission. I am still all so knew in the throws of writing and trying hard to do it well. Therefore hungry for feed back. I am not sure if it hasn’t been read or not…[Read more]

  • I loved your story, his name Freek and the afrikaans slipped in there I could imagine this boer dressed in his kaki best traipsing down the mountain (his backyard :). I also loved the mooi mooi reference. When my daughters were little girls they used to call the shoes they wore to church their moisy shoes and the name stuck for years. I had…[Read more]

  • Oh dear such sadness in this family and I didn’t expect the connection between them all. I do need to know why John fell apart. Why did he pull away from Abi all those years ago when he clearly did love her.
    Thank you I did enjoy your story.

  • Well done my friend, as in the comments you received I also love your use of words for describing scenes and situations.
    The sadness so real for a person who jumps in and helping is so unloved and misunderstood by undeserving people.
    Keep on keeping on 🙂

  • wow. I enjoyed reading this, probably because it is all so close to home. Especially the fogging glasses part. I have had a couple panic attacks too and always leave the building sweating and flustered. I am sure normal breathing is linked to the body temperature control switch 🙂
    I truly hope mask wearing is temporary and not our future.

  • Signs from a Loved One by Stella
    #
    Frustrated Angela slams her laptop closed after reading an article ‘Signs a deceased loved one is still here’. Scouting her pretty garden, there is not one they had s […]

    • Stella,
      This sad situation is well described, her pain is evident. I am happy for the turn in her outlook at the end.

  • Hi, thank you for your comment
    Yes Jasmine is one of the personalities. Edward is the original.
    I am thrilled that you enjoyed reading my story. thank you your words made my day.
    🙂

  • Thank you Linda for your lovely comment truly appreciated. 🙂

  • Hi Peggy

    Thank you for your welcome and your lovely comment.

    I will be genuinely grateful and accepting for all feedback good, bad and suggestive changes. 🙂

  • Hi Randy
    I had a bit of a giggle at your comment, thank you for that. 🙂

    It is all much simpler than a chimpanzee, possibly could have thrown one in the mix though
    Edward, however, was the original Captain but has abandoned ship and left the rest within him to get on with it. Not a case for Detective Morris by any means.

    I had fun with…[Read more]

  • Hi Randy,

    Thank you for your lovely comment. Much appreciated. 🙂

  • Stella and Profile picture of BeckyBecky are now friends 3 months ago

  • Stella and Profile picture of PatrickPatrick are now friends 3 months ago

  • kHi Patrick

    Wow, way to beat yourself up right at the start, haha.
    I think 12 Stories will help you with number one where you are limited to a word count of between maybe 100 words to 2500 words in any given submission.
    Not sure if you have tried this but your conflict may be more manageable if you create an antagonist that will cause an…[Read more]

  • Hi Becky

    Thank you so much for your lovely comment, making me feel a bit better again, 🙂

  • Stella commented on the post, My goals by Stella 3 months ago

    Hi Patrick,
    Thank you so much for your lovely comment. I am a seeker of projects. However, usually, when I start something, I would rather lose sleep than stop. Pretty much one of the modes I am in presently. I have been plotting, setting, working on main characters, antagonists, etc., moving ahead like a steam train on a mission going to…[Read more]

  • Lovely story. At the start, I was expecting it to go off in a different direction, leaving me pleasantly surprised by the potential happy ending. Thank you for that, thank you for sharing. Also loved the style. 🙂

  • The howling winds tug at the blue shutters securely fastened to the cottage windows, continuing their plight of destruction throughout the night, only coming to rest as the sun peeks over the horizon outlining the […]

    • The view of a beachhouse during a hurricane comes to mind in the first paragraph. Good detail. In the second, we finish out the story well, circling back around to why she lives there.

      Nicely done in 100 words. Everything is there, and with feeling.

    • Hi Randy,

      Thank you for your lovely comment. Much appreciated. 🙂

    • Good detail in your story, Stella! For only 100 words you did a great job describing the storm and your cottage. Then having the whale jump the next morning explains why Alison likes living there, even if it means weathering such storms. I also love being in a waterfront cottage on the ocean and watching whales and seals. Good job!

    • Thank you Linda for your lovely comment truly appreciated. 🙂

    • Your description of the storm and your choice of words reinforced the violence of the storm. I love the juxtaposition between the raging storm and the calm after. I especially enjoyed “seeing” the whale breaching the water, like a moment of magic.

  • Why, did I answer my phone this morning, Detective Morris asks himself rubbing his temples. Sitting at the table, they had placed back upright. The small bachelor flat in disarray, strewn with items everywhere, […]

    • An interesting detective story, where the case may be impossible to solve until someone starts talking.

      I enjoyed the tale, though not sure where it was going, and some focus on punctuation would be good, particularly comma usage.

      I am guessing Stella is our culprit, perhaps a chimpanzee? Perhaps Jasmine’s multiple personalities.

    • Hi Randy
      I had a bit of a giggle at your comment, thank you for that. 🙂

      It is all much simpler than a chimpanzee, possibly could have thrown one in the mix though
      Edward, however, was the original Captain but has abandoned ship and left the rest within him to get on with it. Not a case for Detective Morris by any means.

      I had fun with writing this submission, and I wanted to see if other readers would read it how I wrote it.
      I do seem to be failing on that. Even on my submission for ‘Red Lipstick’ it would seem my presentation is misread.
      Thank you so much for taking the time to read my story and comment, always appreciated.

    • Dissociative identity disorder. That must be some trauma Jasmine is avoiding to have six separate lives. Wonder if it is common for males to have female identities.
      Poor Detective Morris needs to take some remedial classes in dealing with suspects exhibiting signs and symptoms of mental health issues. Call an ambulance and a professional. Do not try this sitting at a kitchen table.

    • Interesting story, Stella. Am I understanding correctly, that Jasmine is one of multiple personalities? Detective Morris probably never dealt with a case quite like this!
      here’s quite a few places where quotation marks are missing between tags and a few misplaced commas, but overall it’s a fun read, which I enjoyed very much.

      • Hi, thank you for your comment
        Yes Jasmine is one of the personalities. Edward is the original.
        I am thrilled that you enjoyed reading my story. thank you your words made my day.
        🙂

    • Hi Stella,

      This could be developed into an interesting piece. A story about a person with multiple personalities would be interesting to write.

      Two things I liked:
      ·      Good dialogue. Jasmine has a strong voice and is interesting to read.
      ·      Good differentiation between all the multiple personalities.

      Two things to consider:
      ·      Watch the quotes in the dialogue. Some quotation marks were missing and so the dialogue was confusing to read.
      ·      Give the reader the actual sordid details, rather than summarize that they were given. Readers want to know!

      Have fun with this story. It could be a whirl wind.

      Cheers,

      Pat

      • Hi Pat

        Thank you so much for your comment and good advise truly appreciated and glad you like the story line.
        Would it be cheeky to ask if you would comment on my misunderstood submission. I am still all so knew in the throws of writing and trying hard to do it well. Therefore hungry for feed back. I am not sure if it hasn’t been read or not worth a comment.

        Called: Signs of a Loved one.
        Thanks
        Stella

  • Load More

Stella

Profile picture of Stella

@stella1005

active 2 months ago
Short Story Points balance: 0
Poetry Point balance: 0